Government Colonoscopy

Definition:

A government colonoscopy is when you arrange for the ATF, the IRS and unemployment to investigate your abusive ex, since you couldn't get him arrested for abuse - hopefully he will be arrested for tax fraud or illegally owning a firearm or abusing unemployment during COVID.

Exemplification of Usage:

Them: Did you ever get Killian to stop stalking you?

Me: I ordered government colonoscopy for him. He has bigger problems now.